Wednesday, July 9, 2008

"Oh wait... was she a great big fat person? " ~ Jame Gumb

Since my back surgery at the end of May I have been taking it kind of easy. I have been doing Bikram but I do a lot of it at home instead of the studio. I think it has to do with the weather. It is finally summer here. The sun is out, the sky is blue, and you can actually feel warm!! Hurrah! I love practicing Bikram but it is so hard to go into that studio when it is so beautiful outside. I am thinking it may be my cold weather work-out. There is so much to do around here for exercise that I don't necessarily need to be in a stink studio heated to 105 degrees.

It makes me laugh when I look back at my blog. Here I am trying to lose weight but I keep posting pictures of sweet treats I have made. The good thing about making so many is that I don't like to eat them anymore. Trust me that is a good thing! I stepped on the scale today and I think I have hit a plateau. I haven't gone up or down for a couple of months. Totally frustrating. I'm not sure what is going on. I think the change up in my daily exercise will help.

Today is one of those days I feel like I am destined to be the fat girl. One of those days when I look in the mirror and realize my head is too small for my big body. Ugh. I am usually a pretty self confident person but there are some days when my weight gets the best of me. I hate these feelings. I truly do.

I guess all I can do is walk around the park again and cut my portions in half again. Hmmm, I have a feeling today is going to be bitchy.


Bri said...

No worries... there are so much better things in life than being able to shop in the non-plus size section. I have been a bigger girl since I hit high school, but once I got married I realized I had two choices. 1. Seriously cut down my portions and eliminate sweets as well as excercise vigorously or 2. get over my issues with myself an develop my love of baking even if that means an extra pound or two. I totally understand "those days" though, and they totally suck, and people who have never experienced weight issues will never understand. I just always remind myself that there is more to me than my appearance, and then I remember all of the wonderful things in life that don't suck. Keep your head up. I may not know you, but I feel we have similar attitudes. I feel a better quote for the title of your post would be "don't worry, be happy"

Dale said...

Hugs. I hate it when those feelings swirl up. They're so bogus, so tenuously connected to anything real, but they can be so convincing.


Carol said...

I so relate to the stalled feeling. The last two months I have been maintaining a 25 pound weight loss but I still have 40 pounds more I want to lose. Give yourself some credit that you had surgery and haven't gained any weight! That's an accomplishment in and of itself. (On the good days, I give myself credit for what I've lost! On the bad days I get bitchy too!)


Jody said...

No beating yourself up're the best