"Oh wait... was she a great big fat person? " ~ Jame Gumb

Since my back surgery at the end of May I have been taking it kind of easy. I have been doing Bikram but I do a lot of it at home instead of the studio. I think it has to do with the weather. It is finally summer here. The sun is out, the sky is blue, and you can actually feel warm!! Hurrah! I love practicing Bikram but it is so hard to go into that studio when it is so beautiful outside. I am thinking it may be my cold weather work-out. There is so much to do around here for exercise that I don't necessarily need to be in a stink studio heated to 105 degrees.

It makes me laugh when I look back at my blog. Here I am trying to lose weight but I keep posting pictures of sweet treats I have made. The good thing about making so many is that I don't like to eat them anymore. Trust me that is a good thing! I stepped on the scale today and I think I have hit a plateau. I haven't gone up or down for a couple of months. Totally frustrating. I'm not sure what is going on. I think the change up in my daily exercise will help.

Today is one of those days I feel like I am destined to be the fat girl. One of those days when I look in the mirror and realize my head is too small for my big body. Ugh. I am usually a pretty self confident person but there are some days when my weight gets the best of me. I hate these feelings. I truly do.

I guess all I can do is walk around the park again and cut my portions in half again. Hmmm, I have a feeling today is going to be bitchy.

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away"

A couple of weeks ago I bought some massively huge apples at the farmer's market. We had a few left over that were starting to get soft so I decided I had to bake something with them. I didn't have enough time to make a pie so I decided on French Apple Cobbler.

What is French Apple Cobbler? It is apple cobbler with the addition of vanilla. Oooooh, fancy!! It turned out really well. Agnes and Sean almost ate the whole thing.

FRENCH APPLE COBBLER

Ingredients:

Apple Filling:
5 cups tart apples, peeled, sliced
3/4 cup sugar + I throw in a couple tablespoons of brown sugar
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup water
1 tablespoon butter, softened
Topping:
1/2 cup flour, sifted
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons butter, softened
1 egg, slightly beaten
Preparation:

In a medium bowl, combine apples, 3/4 cup sugar, 2 tablespoons flour, cinnamon, 1/4 teaspoon salt, vanilla and water. Turn into a lightly buttered 9-inch square pan. Dot apples with 1 tablespoon butter.
Combine all topping ingredients. Beat with wooden spoon until batter is smooth. Drop batter in 9 portions, over the apples, spacing evenly. Batter will spread during baking. Bake 35 to 40 minutes at 375° or until apples are tender and crust is golden brown. Serve warm with cream or ice cream.


Okay, okay, I know I have been posting nice fattening recipes. I have been trying to keep up with my exercise but after the back surgery it has been really hard for me to get motivated again. I am so scared I am going to hurt myself again. I know Bikram would make my back feel so much better but I have a few pain killers left to help! :)

Anyway, an apple a day...right?

“Pain is weakness leaving the body” ~ Tom Sobal

I want the weakness gone!! I am so sick of being in chronic pain. I just need to get to Friday. Friday is the big day. I get to have back surgery. YAY. I won't be able to do yoga or anything else for about 4 weeks. I start physical therapy on the 3rd. I guess the sooner you do it the better it works.

It is crazy how pain can affect every part of your life. Physically and emotionally I am a mess. I have been the biggest bitch the past week because of the pain. I just want it gone. As of today I can't even think back to a time I haven't been in pain. Isn't that just sad?

Okay, enough of the pity party. Just a few more days and I will be back to my happy go lucky self!!

"Things I Overheard While Talking to Myself" ~ Alan Alda

Wow. This is a huge post all about me! Well, I guess there are a few other people mentioned. LOL

We are finally starting to get things settled in the new house. My mom left on Tuesday after being here for three weeks. It was a lot of fun having her here but I am so glad she is gone. LOL I know that sounds horrible but we can finally just lounge and work around our house without having to entertain anyone.

We are still unpacking boxes but I am in no hurry to get everything unpacked. The kitchen is unpacked, Agnes’ room is unpacked, and the living room. I have a feeling we are going to be living her for a very long time so if things are still in boxes that is okay with me. ☺

Everyone on our street is so nice. We have been invited to the Memorial Day block party. We are becoming good friends with the people who live behind us. They have a little 3 year old girl too! She and Agnes have been playing together almost everyday. It is so awesome. It makes me so happy to know that Agnes will have friends to play with everyday.

I finally finished planting all the flowers in our front yard. I planted 240 petunias, 10 alyssum, 4 giant geraniums, and 4 massive hanging planters. It is going to look awesome when everything starts growing in. I will get some pics of the front yard later today. It is 92° so I am done being outside. I am not used to this hot, sticky weather. It is going to take some getting used to.

This is our backyard. I am going to be working on it this weekend. It needs a lot of trimming, weeds pulled, and some love. When it is done it is going to be the coolest backyard ever. I even have my own Virgin Mary statue. You have no idea how happy that makes me.


Bleeding Hearts

My own personal Virgin!

Our secret garden

Let’s see what else has been going on the past three weeks. I think I showed my mom everything you need to see in the Portland metro area. We did the Chinese Gardens, Powell’s Books, and The Saturday Market (I love the Saturday Market. It is where I buy my soap. If you get a chance go to Dirtyfacesoap.com. She makes the most amazing soap. I will never use anything else on Agnes’ skin again or mine). I took her for walks along the Willamette and the Columbia Rivers, took her to Ikea, Pastaworks, Washington Park playground
loads of yummy dinners, and we had some really nice days hanging out at the house chatting and cooking with Agnes. I know we did more but I took a couple Vicodin about an hour ago and I am not concentrating so well. ☺

This is a picture of us at the Vancouver Farmer’s Market. Not the greatest market (I will keep going to the PSU one) but we had fun.


We celebrated Mother’s Day with my mom last weekend. We went to The Restaurant at the Historic Reserve. It was fantastic. Here are a couple pictures:


The Fam.


I adore this picture. I had to lean down because I was wearing 4-inch heels. LOL

My mom watched Agnes a couple of nights so Sean and I could go out for dinner. The first night we went out to a kind of fancy place. The second we hit up the Salmon Creek Brew Pub. It was a nice pub the beer is okay. No pilsner so I actually had a couple IPA’s. If you know me you know I am not an IPA fan. Too hoppy! But it wasn’t so bad. Sean and I were having such a blast being out by ourselves that we didn’t want to go straight home. So what do you do when you have a babysitter for the first time in months? PUT-PUT GOLF! We had such a blast!!! I even beat Sean!! LOL It was one of the most fun dates we have had in a really long time. I love being married to such a fun guy.




Agnes took this picture of us a couple mornings ago. I love this picture so much!



Tomorrow we are heading over the river to the PSU Farmer’s Market to shop for fresh produce. I haven’t been to the market for a few weeks. I miss having fresh veggies and fruit in the house. Sunday I am going to yoga. I haven’t been in over a week and I am feeling it. I have been way too busy with my mom and the house to get to the studio.

The big news is on May 30th I am having back surgery again. I am really scared about it. I am not sure why I am so nervous this time but I am. I guess it is because I am so far from my family and my mom can’t come over to take care of me. I really need to go to yoga as much as possible the next 10 days so I can get loose and limber before the surgery. My back has been feeling like it is getting worse.

Perhaps planting all those flowers wasn’t such a great idea. At least I have some good drugs to get me until the 30th. LOL

The past week has been rough on the old diet and exercise routines. I haven’t been able to go to the yoga studio since we moved. It sucks. I have been getting a lot of exercise but I feel like crap. Our new house has individual thermostats for each room so I can heat up our bedroom to about 90 degrees. I turned the heat up in our bedroom and did an at home Bikram class. It went really well. I worked just as hard as I do at the studio. As much as I love having my mom here it is really screwing with my routine. I miss my yoga classes so much. I can’t wait until next Friday! I can drop Miss Agnes off at school and head down to the studio.

It was a busy weekend. Saturday we hit up the farmers market in Vancouver. It was such a great time. I can’t wait to shop there the weekends this summer. So much produce.

Yesterday, my mom, Agnes, and I went to the Portland Classical Chinese Gardens. It was absolutely beautiful. The flowers, trees, water building, and pathways are amazing. We stopped in the tradition tea house for some tea and snacks. Agnes was so cute. She shared tea with her grandma and ate some handmade almond cookies. Mmm… I have a bunch of pictures from yesterday that I will post later. I am too tired to mess with iPhoto.

Agnes starts her new school tomorrow. I hope she likes it as much as she did her old school. After I drop her off I have to head over to my doctor appointment. I am having back surgery in the next few weeks and I need to get everything all set up. I am hoping that this will be the last time I need the surgery. Between the surgery and the Bikram my back should be as good as new by the end of the fall. My mom and I are going to IKEA tomorrow too. I need to get a bunch of stuff for the new house.

Later this week I am taking my mom to the Japanese Gardens. I want her to see as much of Portland/Vancouver as possible.

For Mother’s Day we are taking my mom to The Restaurant at the Historic Reserve for brunch. Sean and I went for dinner here the other night and it was fantastic. I think my mom will totally dig it.

"Life is trying things to see if they work" ~ Ray Bradbury

Yes, August was my last post. Life has taken some pretty unexpected turns in the past 6 months. Things I never imagined happening. In December, we moved to Portland, Oregon. We were moving so we could be closer to Sean's dad who had been ill. Jim passed away on November 30th. I miss Jim greatly. He was such a fun guy. It really sucks for Agnes that she will never know her Grandpa.

It has been a year since I started this blog and guess what? I am not skinny! Am I sad? No! I am 20 pounds lighter than I was when I started this journal. And, you know what? THAT ROCKS! I am still working out as much as I can. I have finally found a gym here in Portland that I love. I have been doing my cardio stuff and started back up with the weights. I have been taking Nia classes as well. They are so much fun but I feel like a complete idiot dancing around. I am trying to find a yoga instructor that I like. Until I do I will continue doing yoga here at home. Agnes loves doing yoga or oh-ga with me. She will roll out my mat, step into Mountain pose, and yell "Mommy! Oh-ga! Now!" I may not get to my full routine but who cares when I can do Oh-ga with my Bug.

I will be having back surgery again in May/June. I am really hoping this is the last time I will have to have it done. It is such an inconvineice. At least Agnes is going to "school" two days a week so that should help with my recovery time.

I have some friends who have just started a blog of their own called Wheres My Damn Answer Weblog - Five Girls on Wine Looking for the Answer. Swing on by for a read. They are a bunch of really fun gals.

Now, that I have a little bit more time on my hands I really hope to keep up with my journal. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I have said it before but I am thinking the more I write about this journey the more it will help me.